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for a week or a weekend. Then it's up to me to think of some
reason why we can't come. Ben absolutely hates visiting and thinks
there ought to be a law against invitations. After a couple of visits
Ben thought of a method of putting off people1. He would write
himself a telegram and sign it with the name of one of the famous
producers, and leave the telegram with his secretary with the instructions
to send it to us twenty-four hours later. When it arrived
at whatever place we were, we would put on long faces and say
how sorry we were, but of course business was business, so goodbye.
There was never any suspicion even when the telegrams were
ridiculous, like this one:
Both the leading actors have laryngitis Stop2 Score must be
rewritten half a tone lower Stop Come at once Stop
С. В. Dillingham
However, if we happened to be enjoying ourselves, then Ben
would say to our hosts that he wasn't going to let any theatrical
producer spoil his fun.
Last September we were invited to come and spend a week with
a nice, intelligent couple, the Thayers. "I promise you," Mrs. Thayer
said, "that you won't be disturbed at all; we won't invite people in.
I won't allow Mr. Drake to even touch the piano. All day he can do
nothing or anything, just as he pleases."
We accepted the invitation. "If they stick to their promise, it
may be a lot better than staying in New York where my producer
won't give me a minute's peace," said Ben. 'And if things aren't as
good as they look, we always have that telegram."
The Thayers met us at the station in an expensive-looking
limousine. "Ralph," said Mrs. Thayer to her husband, "you sit in
one of the little seats and Mr. and Mrs. Drake will sit back here
"I'd rather have one of the little seats myself," said Ben and he
"No, sir!" said Mrs. Thayer. "You came to us for a rest, and
we're not going to start you off uncomfortable." It was no use
1 a method of putting off people - способ, как избавляться от людей
2 Stop — зд. точка
All through the drive Ben was unable to think of anything but
how terrible his coat would look when he got out.
After luncheon we had coffee.
"Don't you take cream, Mr. Drake?" Mrs. Thayer asked.
"But that's because you don't get good cream in New York."
"No. It's because I don't like cream in coffee."
"You would like our cream. We have our own cows. Won't vou
try just a little?"
"But just a little, to see how rich it is." She poured some cream
into Ben's coffee-cup and for a second I held my breath and closed
my eyes for fear of seeing Ben throwing the cup in her face.
After luncheon we were sitting in the living-room when Ben
rose and went straight to the piano.
"None of that!" said Mrs. Thayer. "I haven't forgotten my promise."
"But there is a melody in my head that I'd like to try."
"Oh, yes, I know all about that. You just think that you MUST
play to us! We invited you here for yourself, not to enjoy your talent."
Ben walked over to the book-case and took a book out.
"What book is that?" asked Mrs. Thayer.
"The Great Gatsby," said Ben. "I've always wanted to read it."
"Heavens!" said Mrs. Thayer as she took it away from him.
"That's old! You'll find the newest ones there on the table. We keep
pretty well up to date. Ralph and I are both great readers. Just try
one of those books in that pile. They're all good."
Ben took a book, sat down and opened it.
"Man! Man!" exclaimed Mrs. Thayer. "You've picked the most
uncomfortable chair in the house."
"He likes straight chairs," I said.
"It makes me uncomfortable just to look at you. You'd better
take this chair here. It's the softest, nicest chair you've ever sat on."
"I like hard straight chairs," said Ben, fighting down his annoyance1,
but he sank into the soft, nice one and again opened the book.
"Oh, you never can see there!" said the fussy Mrs. Thayer. "You'll
ruin your eyes. Get up just a minute and let Ralph move your chair
to that lamp."
1 fighting down his annoyance - борясь с раздражением
"I don't believe I want to read just now," said Ben.
And so it went on all through the afternoon and evening.
Just as we were getting to sleep, Mrs. Thayer knocked on our
door. "I'm afraid you haven't covers enough," she called.
"Thanks," I said. "We're quite warm."
"I'm afraid you aren't," continued Mrs. Thayer to whom it never
occurred how annoying she was.
"Lock the door," said Ben ill-temperedly, "before she comes in
and feels our feet."
All through breakfast next morning we waited for the telephone
call about the telegram. The phone did ring once and Mrs. Thayer
answered, but we couldn't hear what she said.
After breakfast Ben told Mrs. Thayer that he had a feeling that
he must be back in New York.
"That's very strange," said Mrs. Thayer, "because a telegram
came to you at breakfast time. I wasn't going to tell you about it
because I had promised that you wouldn't be disturbed. I remember
the telegram by heart. It ran:
Bass drum part all wrong. Would like you to come to the theater
Just as the trainmen were shouting "Board!" Mrs. Thayer said:
"Please forgive me if I have done something terrible, but I
answered Mr. Buck's telegram. I wired: "Mr. Ben Drake resting at
my home. Must not be bothered. Suggest that you keep bass drums
still for a week. And I signed my name."
Sense of Humour
One night I am standing1 in front of Mindy's restaurant on
Broadway, thinking of practically nothing whatever, when all of a
sudden I feel a very terrible pain in my left foot.
1 здесь и далее настоящее время используется для актуализации инфор-
In fact, this pain is so very terrible that it causes me to leap up
and down like a bullfrog, and to let out loud cries of agony, and to
speak some very profane language, which is by no means my
custom, although of course I recognize the pain as coming from a
hot foot, because I often experience this pain before.
Furthermore, I know Joe the Joker must be in the neighbourhood,
as Joe the Joker has the most wonderful sense of humour of
anybody in this town, and is always around giving people the hot
foot, and gives it to me more times than I can remember. In fact, I
hear Joe the Joker invents the hot foot, and it finally becomes a
very popular idea all over the country.
The way you give a hot foot is to sneak up behind some guy
who is standing around thinking of not much, and stick a paper
match to his shoe between the sole and the upper along about
where his little toe ought to be, and then light the match. By and
by the guy will feel a terrible pain in his foot and will start stamping
around, and hollering, and carrying on1 generally, and it is always a
most comical sight and a wonderful laugh to one and all to see him
No one in the world can give a hot foot as good as Joe the Joker,
because it takes a guy who can sneak up very quiet on the guy who
is to get the hot foot, and Joe can sneak up so quiet many guys on
Broadway are willing to lay you odds2 that he can give a mouse a
hot foot if you can find a mouse that wears shoes. Furthermore,
Joe the Joker can take plenty of care of himself in case the guy who
gets the hot foot feels like taking the matter up3, which sometimes
happens, especially with guys who get their shoes made to order at
forty bobs per copy and do not care to have holes burned in these
But Joe does not care what kind of shoes the guys are wearing
when he feels like giving out hot foots, and furthermore, he does
not care who the guys are, although many citizens think he makes
a mistake the time he gives a hot foot to Frankie Ferocious. In fact,
many citizens are greatly horrified by this action, and go around
saying no good will come of it.
1 to carry on — беситься
2 are willing to lay you odds - готовы держать пари
3 to take the matter up — разобраться
This Frankie Ferocious comes from over in Brooklyn, where he
is considered a rising citizen in many respects, and by no means a
guy to give hot foots to, especially as Frankie Ferocious has no
sense of humour whatever. In fact, he is always very solemn, and
nobody ever sees him laugh, and he certainly does not laugh when
Joe the Joker gives him a hot foot one day on Broadway when
Frankie Ferocious is standing talking over a business matter with
some guys from the Bronx.
He only scowls at Joe, and says something in Italian, and while
I do not understand Italian, it sounds so unpleasant that I guarantee
I will leave town inside of the next two hours if he says it to me.
Of course Frankie Ferocious's name is not really Ferocious, but
something in Italian like Feroccio, and I hear he originally comes
from Sicily, although he lives in Brooklyn for quite some years, and
from a modest beginning, he builds himself up until he is a very
large operator in merchandise of one kind and another, especially
alcohol. He is a big guy of maybe thirty-odd, and he has hair blacker
than a yard up a chimney, and black eyes, and black eyebrows, and
a slow way of looking at people.
Nobody knows a whole lot about Frankie Ferocious, because he
never has much to say, and he takes his time saying it1, but everybody
gives him plenty of room when he comes around, as there
are rumours that Frankie never likes to be crowded. As far as I
am concerned, I do not care for any part of Frankie Ferocious,
because his slow way of looking at people always makes me
nervous, and I am always sorry Joe the Joker gives him a hot foot,
because I figure Frankie Ferocious is bound to consider it a most
disrespectful action, and hold it against everybody that lives on
the Island of Manhattan.
But Joe the Joker only laughs when anybody tells him he is out
of line in giving Frankie the hot foot, and says it is not his fault if
Frankie has no sense of humour. Furthermore, Joe says he will not
only give Frankie another hot foot if he gets a chance, but that he
will give hot foots to the Prince of Wales or Mussolini, if he catches
them in the right spot, although Regret, the horse player, states
that Joe can have twenty to one any time that he will not give
Mussolini any hot foots and get away with it.
1 he takes his time saying it - он не уставал повторять об этом
Anyway, just as I suspect, there is Joe the Joker watching me
when I feel the hot foot, and he is laughing very heartily, and
furthermore, a large number of other citizens are also laughing
heartily, because Joe the Joker never sees any fun in giving people
the hot foot unless others are present to enjoy the joke.
Well, naturally when I see who it is gives me the hot foot I join
in the laughter, and go over and shake hands with Joe, and when I
shake hands with him there is more laughter, because it seems Joe
has a hunk of Limburger cheese in his duke, and what I shake
hands with is this Limburger. Furthermore, it is some of Mindy's
Limburger cheese, and everybody knows Mindy's Limburger is very
squashy, and also very loud.
Of course I laugh at this, too, although to tell the truth I will laugh
much more heartily if Joe the Joker drops dead in front of me, because
I do not like to be made the subject of laughter on Broadway. But my
laugh is really quite hearty when Joe takes the rest of the cheese that
is not on my fingers and smears it on the steering-wheels of some
automobiles parked in front of Mindy's, because I get to thinking of
what the drivers will say when they start steering their cars.
Then I get to talking to Joe the Joker, and I ask him how things
are up in Harlem, where Joe and his younger brother Freddy, and
several other guys have a small organization operating in beer, and
Joe says things are as good as can be expected considering business
conditions. Then I ask him how Rosa is getting along, this Rosa
being Joe the Joker's ever-loving wife, and a personal friend of
mine, as I know her when she is Rosa Midnight and is singing in
the old Hot Box before Joe hauls off and marries her.
Well, at this question Joe the Joker starts laughing, and I can
see that something appeals to his sense of humour, and finally he
speaks as follows:
"Why," he says, "do you not hear the news about Rosa? She
takes the wind on1 me a couple of months ago for my friend Frankie
Ferocious, and is living in an apartment over in Brooklyn, right
near his house, although," Joe says, "of course you understand I
am telling you this only to answer your question, and not to holler
copper on2 Rosa."
to take the wind on — бросить
to holler copper on - зд. настучать
Then he lets out another large ha-ha, and in fact Joe the Joker
keeps laughing until I am afraid he will injure himself internally.
Personally, I do not see anything comical in a guy's ever-loving
wife taking the wind on him for a guy like Frankie Ferocious, so
when Joe the Joker quiets down a bit I ask him what is funny about
"Why," Joe says, "I have to laugh every time I think of how the
big greaseball is going to feel when he finds out how expensive
Rosa is. I do not know how many things Frankie Ferocious has
running for him in Brooklyn," Joe says, "but he better try to move
himself in on the mint1 if he wishes to keep Rosa going."
Then he laughs again, and I consider it wonderful the way Joe is
able to keep his sense of humour even in such a situation as this,
although up to this time I always think Joe is very daffy indeed
about Rosa, who is a little doll, weighing maybe ninety pounds
with her hat on and quite cute.
Now I judge from what Joe the Joker tells me that Frankie
Ferocious knows Rosa before Joe marries her and is always pitching
to her when she is singing in the Hot Box, and even after she is
Joe's ever-loving wife, Frankie occasionally calls her up, especially
when he commences to be a rising citizen of Brooklyn, although of
course Joe does not learn about these calls until later. And about the
time Frankie Ferocious commences to he a rising citizen of Brooklyn,
things begin breaking a little tough for Joe the Joker, what with the
depression and all, and he has to economize on Rosa in spots, and if
there is one thing Rosa cannot stand it is being economized on.
Along about now, Joe the Joker gives Frankie Ferocious the hot
foot, and just as many citizens state at the time, it is a mistake, for
Frankie starts calling Rosa up more than somewhat, and speaking
of what a nice place Brooklyn is to live in — which it is, at that —
and between these boosts for Brooklyn and Joe the Joker's economy,
Rosa hauls off leaving Joe a note telling him that if he does not
like it he knows what he can do.
"Well, Joe," I say, after listening to his story, "I always hate to
hear of these little domestic difficulties among my friends, but
maybe this is all for the best. Still, I feel sorry tor you, if it will do
you any good," I say.
J to move himself in on the mint - заработать денег
"Do not feel sorry for me," Joe says, "If you wish to feel sorry
for anybody, feel sorry for Frankie Ferocious, and," he says, "if you
can spare a little more sorrow, give it to Rosa."
And Joe the Joker laughs very hearty again and starts telling me
about a little scatter that he has up in Harlem where he keeps a
chair fixed up with electric wires so he can give anybody that sits
down in it a nice jolt, which sounds very humorous to me.
Finally Joe says he has to get back to Harlem, but first he goes
to the telephone in the corner cigar store and calls up Mindy's and
imitates a doll's voice, and tells Mindy he is Peggy Joyce, or somebody,
and orders fifty dozen sandwiches sent up at once to an
apartment in West Seventy-Second Street for a birthday party,
although of course there is no such number as he gives, and nobody
there will wish fifty dozen sandwiches if there is such a number.
Then Joe gets in his car and starts off, and while he is waiting for
the traffic lights at Fiftieth Street, I see citizens on the sideways making
sudden leaps and looking around very fierce, and I know Joe the
Joker is plugging them with pellets made out of tin foil, which he fires
from a rubber band hooked between his thumb and forefinger.
Joe the Joker is very expert with this proposition, and it is very
funny to see the citizens jump, although once or twice in his life
Joe makes a miscue and knocks out somebody's eye. But it is all in
fun, and shows you what a wonderful sense of humour Joe has.
Well, a few days later I see by the papers where a couple of
Harlem guys Joe the Joker is mobbed up with1 are found done up
in sacks over in Brooklyn, very dead indeed, and the coppers say it
is because they are trying to move in on certain business enterprises
that belong to nobody but Frankie Ferocious. But of course the
coppers do not say Frankie Ferocious puts these guys in the sacks,
because in the first place Frankie will report them to Headquarters2
if the coppers say such a thing about him and in the second place
putting guys in sacks is strictly a St Louis idea and to have a guy
put in a sack properly you have to send to St Louis for experts in
Now, putting a guy in a sack is not as easy as it sounds, and in
fact it takes quite a lot of practice and experience. To put a guy in
1 to mob up with — тусоваться
2 Headquarters - главное полицейское управление
a sack properly, you first have to put him to sleep, because naturally
no guy is going to walk into a sack wide awake unless he is a plumb
sucker1. Some people claim the best way to put a guy to sleep is to
give him a sleeping powder of some kind in a drink, but the real
experts just tap the guy on the noggin with a blackjack, which
saves the expense of buying the drink.
Anyway, after the guy is asleep, you double him up like a pocketknife,
and tie a cord or a wire around his neck and under his
knees. Then you put him in a gunny sack, and leave him some
place, and by and by when the guy wakes up and finds himself in
the sack, naturally he wants to get out and the first thing he does is
to try to straighten out his knees. This pulls the cord around his
neck up so tight that after a while the guy is out of breath.
So then when somebody comes along and opens the sack they
find the guy dead, and nobody is responsible for this unfortunate
situation, because after all the guy really commits suicide, because
if he does not try to straighten out his knees he may live to a ripe
old age, if he recovers from the tap on the noggin.
Well, a couple of days later I see by the papers where three
Brooklyn citizens are scragged as they are walking peaceably along
Clinton Street, the scragging being done by some parties in an
automobile who seem to have a machine gun and the papers state
that the citizens are friends of Frankie Ferocious, and that it is
rumoured the parties with the machine gun are from Harlem.
I judge by this that there is some trouble in Brooklyn, especially
as about a week after the citizens are scragged in Clinton Street,
another Harlem guy is found done up in sack like a Virginia ham
near Prospect Park, and now who is it but Joe the Joker's brother,
Freddy, and I know Joe is going to be greatly displeased by this.
By and by it gets so nobody in Brooklyn will open as much as a
sack of potatoes without first calling in the gendarmes for fear a
pair of No. 8 shoes will jump out at them.
Now one night I see Joe the Joker, and this time he is all alone,
and I wish to say I am willing to leave him all alone, because
something tells me he is hotter than a stove. But he grabs me as I
am going past, so naturally I stop to talk to him, and the first thing
I say is how sorry I am about his brother.
1 a plumb sucker - болван, простофиля
"Well," Joe the Joker says, "Freddy is always a kind of a sap.
Rosa calls him up and asks him to come over to Brooklyn to see
her. She wishes to talk to Freddy about getting me to give her a
divorce," Joe says, "so she can marry Frankie Ferocious, I suppose.
Anyway," he says. "Freddy always likes Rosa, and thinks maybe he
can patch it up between us. So," Joe says, "he winds up in a sack.
They get him after he leaves her apartment. I do not claim Rosa
will ask him to come over if she has any idea he will be sacked," Joe
says, "but," he says, "she is responsible. She is a bad-luck doll."
Then he starts to laugh and at first I am much horrified thinking
it is because something about Freddy being sacked strikes his sense
of humour, when he says to me like this.
"Say," he says, "I am going to play a wonderful joke on Frankie
"Well, Joe," I say, "you are not asking me for advice, but I am
going to give you some free gratis, and for nothing. Do not play
any jokes on Frankie Ferocious, as I hear he has no more sense of
humour than a nanny goat. In fact," I say, "I hear he is a tough1
"Oh," Joe the Joker says, "he must have some sense of humour
somewhere to stand for2 Rosa. I hear he is daffy about her. In fact,
I understand she is the only person in the world he really likes and
trusts. But I must play a joke on him. I am going to have myself
delivered to Frankie Ferocious in a sack."
Well, of course I have to laugh at this myself, and Joe the Joker
laughs with me. Personally, I am laughing just at the idea of anybody
having themselves delivered to Frankie Ferocious in a sack, and
especially Joe the Joker, but of course I have no idea Joe really
means what he says.
"Listen," Joe says, finally. 'A guy from St Louis who is a friend
of mine is doing most of the sacking for Frankie Ferocious. His
name is Ropes McGonnigie. In fact," Joe says, "he is a very dear
old pal3 of mine, and he has a wonderful sense of humour like me.
Ropes McGonnigie has nothing whatever to do with sacking
Freddy," Joe says, "and he is very indignant about it since he-finds
1 tough - зд. неблагодарный
2 to stand for — терпеть
J pal — друг
out Freddy is my brother, so he is anxious to help me play a joke
"Only last night," Joe says, "Frankie Ferocious sends for Ropes
and tells him he will appreciate it as a special favour if Ropes will
bring me to him in a sack. I suppose," Joe says, "that Frankie
Ferocious hears from Rosa what Freddy is bound to tell her about
my ideas on divorce. I have very strict ideas on divorce," Joe says,
"especially where Rosa is concerned. I will see her in what's-this
before I ever do her and Frankie Ferocious such a favour as giving
her a divorce."
'Anyway," Joe the Joker says, "Ropes tells me about Frankie
Ferocious propositioning him, so I send Ropes back to Frankie
Ferocious to tell him he knows I am to be in Brooklyn tomorrow
night, and furthermore, Ropes tells Frankie that he will have me in
a sack in no time. And so he will," Joe says.
"Well," I say, "personally, I see no percentage in being delivered
to Frankie Ferocious in a sack, because as near as I can make out
from what I read in the papers, there is no future for a guy in a
sack that goes to Frankie Ferocious. What I cannot figure out," I
say, "is where the joke on Frankie comes in."
"Why," Joe the Joker says, "the joke is, I will not be asleep in the
sack, and my hands will not be tied, and in each of my hands I will
have a John Roscoe, so when the sack is delivered to Frankie
Ferocious and I pop out blasting away, can you not imagine his
Well, I can imagine this, all right. In fact, when I get to thinking
of the look of surprise that is bound to come to Frankie Ferocious's
face when Joe the Joker comes out of the sack I have to laugh, and
Joe the Joker laughs right along with me.
"Of course," Joe says, "Ropes McGonnigle will be there to start
blasting with me, in case Frankie Ferocious happens to have any
Then Joe the Joker goes on up the street, leaving me still
laughing from thinking of how amazed Frankie Ferocious will be
when Joe bounces out of the sack and starts throwing slugs around
and about. I do not hear of Joe from that time to this, but I hear
the rest of the story from very reliable parties.
It seems that Ropes McGonnigle docs not deliver the sack
himself, after all, but sends it by an expressman to Frankie Fero-
cious's home. Frankie Ferocious receives many sacks such as this
in his time, because it seems that it is a sort of passion with him to
personally view the contents of the sacks and check up on them
before they are distributed about the city, and of course Ropes
McGonnigle knows about this passion from doing so much sacking
When the expressman takes the sack into Frankie's house,
Frankie personally lugs it down into his basement, and there he
outs with a big John Roscoe and fires six shots into the sack because
it seems Ropes McGonnigle tips him off1 to Joe the Joker's plan to
pop out of the sack and start blasting.
I hear Frankie Ferocious has a very strange expression on his
pan and is laughing the only laugh anybody ever hears from him
when the gendarmes break in and put the arm on him for murder,
because it seems that when Ropes McGonnigle tells Frankie of Joe
the Joker's plan, Frankie tells Ropes what he is going to do with his
own hands before opening the sack. Naturally, Ropes speaks to Joe
the Joker of Frankie's idea about filling the sack full of slugs, and
Joe's sense of humour comes right out again.
So, bound and gagged, but otherwise as right as rain2 in the
sack that is delivered to Frankie Ferocious, is by no means Joe the
Joker, but Rosa.
1 to tip off — выдать
2 as right as rain - целая и невредимая
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2. Чуковский К. Высокое искусство. М., 1968.
3. Флорин С. Муки творческие. М„ 1983.
4. Гинзбург Л. Разбилось лишь сердце мое. "Новый мир", 1981, № 8.
5. Лилова А. Введение в общую теорию перевода М., 1985.
6. Поповиг А. Проблемы художественного перевода. М., 1980.
7. Комиссаров В. Н. Слово о переводе. М., 1973.
8. Комиссаров В. Н. Общая теория перевода. М., 1999.
9. Комиссаров В. Н. Современное переводоведение. М., 2000.
10. История русской переводной художественной литературы. СПб, 1995.
11. Финкель А. 66-ой сонет в русских переводах // Мастерство перевода.
12. Брандес М. П. Стиль и перевод. М., 1988.
13. Латышев Л. К. Перевод: проблемы теории, практики и методики пре-
подавания. М., 1988.
14. Рецкер Я. И. Теория перевода и переводческая практика. М., 1974.
15. Бархударов Л. С. Язык и перевод. М., 1975.
16. Вопросы теории перевода в зарубежной лингвистике. М., 1978.
17. Гагегиладзе Г. Р. Введение в теорию художественного перевода. Тбили-
18. Копанев П. И. Вопросы истории и теории художественного перевода.
19. Федоров А. В. Основы общей теории перевода. М., 1983.
20. Галь Н. Слово живое и мертвое. М., 2001.
21. Ревзин И. И.. Розенцвейг В. Ю. Основы общего и машинного перевода.
Некоторые теоретигеские положения 4
Занятие 1. Можно ли перевести подтекст? 11
Занятие 2. Перевод поэзии 19
Занятие 3. Русский Бернс 22
Занятие 4. Шекспир в русских переводах 40
Занятие 5. Байрон в русских переводах 46
Занятие 6. Винни-Пух говорит по-русски 59
Занятие 7—8. Русские переводы "Алисы в стране чудес" 72
Практические занятия 107
I. Тексты, в которых преобладает информация первого рода
(общественно-политические и научные) 107
И. Тексты, в которых преобладает информация второго
Литература ,. 158
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Все это дает нам возможность понять, где находится центр Вселенной, как и почему возникли и угасли динозавры, отчего человек единственный...
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Что нами движет? Почему мы радуемся и страдаем, почему ведем себя именно так, а не иначе? Что заставляет нас желать нового? Почему...
Акцент следует сделать на различии иллюстраций. В итоге дети должны понять, что каждый художник по-своему представляет героев сказки....
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Многие черты характера, приобретённые в детстве, человек проносит через всю долгую жизнь. Вот почему с самого начала, с ранних лет...
Это книга о неформалах и для неформалов, а ещё для их родителей, друзей, учителей, журналистов, политиков, социологов… может, даже...